01 June 2009

Addictions. Where it took me...and how I walked away. This will be an ongoing thread of my recovery...and my Full Circle return...

The above photos are the loving people God blessed me with...those that didn't walk away...even in my darkest hours...My heroes, my heart and soul...forevermore...

To the many that have unconditionally loved, supported, had faith in me, picked me up again and again...with out condition. The whole "Full Circle" story is posted on another site. It's well explained. It's about where I was...who I met along the way...those that walked away from me...and those who stayed to fight the incredible demons of addiction with me. I'm Full Circle...like life, love and the planet...coming back to give back what was so freely given to me.

I would like to post here my letter to Lydia Cornell. I was staying in Marina Del Rey...and I sent her an email. We met up a few times. I met her husband and sons...and went to their beautiful home in Beverly Hills for dinner. We ran down memory lane...and what a lane it was.
I used to live 1 block West and 1 block North from Lydia...yes, we were neighbors...Thank God.

Dear Lydia...Funny how things come full circle...like life, the planet...like love, no beginning...and no end.I've written a couple of stories for CNN that they took. Some about family, politics, God...and the sins of greed...and the joy of little cherished things that we take for granted.Thank you for starting my journey...at the very beginning (with a lot of patience and a lot of love) to a clear open mind...eyes wide open...not jaded...just aware...watching and experiencing the joy of God's blessings (his gifts) to us. I'm fully aware...but I will always somewhat maintain an innocence.I lost my grandmother in my arms a few months ago...it was just as amazing as how I lost my sister. In my heart...I would never grieve so bad that I would deprive her of what she worked so hard for (95 years)...the gift of heaven.I would like to let you read my story sometime.Anyway, back to "the full circle" thing.I have been blessed with so many people in my life...including you...that unconditionally loved me...had faith in me...gave me many chances...and believed in me so much that you guys picked me up and dusted me off again and again...and pointed me to my journey on the planet.I'm here in L.A. staying on the Marina. I'll be here until Thursday. I've been set onto yet another mission...to come full circle and help someone that helped me immensely.My "Aunt" Inez was my neighbor in Beverly Hills. She lived in the city from 16-81. When her apartment was acquired by a new "greedy" owner...he illegally evicted seniors and 2 disabled people. They didn't know their rights. They didn't know it was illegal (at that time) they didn't know the resources they were eligible for...They were banished from their kingdom...the only place they knew...to the streets with a promise of $ 5,000.My friend worked until her mid 70s. She was an old time switchboard operator at a hotel...and then for almost 40 years as the elevator operator at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel...She was rewarded 600.00 in retirement. She didn't know about SSI, Medical, Prescription coverage...or anything. She sleeps in a sleeping bag on the floor in a shoe box room on South Croft Ave...East of the Beverly Center. You can't remove an 86 year old woman from the only place familiar to her. Her rent is close to $700.00...it scares me to think where she got the "extra" to help her cover her bills.I came from Boston to help. Not for accolades...not for points...just for the only "right thing to do". No one else would help. I do a lot of work for the people who can't, won't or don't know how to. I have a lot of doors slammed in my face. So, God bless her, my grandmother taught me to either open another door OR if there are no options...kick it down.My friend now has SSI...medical insurance...prescription insurance...and someone to check in on her. Now she has some vitamins in her...and she has come "full circle" from the dark of Night...to face in the Sun.Seniors paved the way for us. They worked so hard for everything we have. They always did the right thing.Seniors are now discarded, dismissed and forgotten.I kicked down some doors.On this journey, I won't forget what I've seen and learned...and I will never be the same...in a good way.Sorry to reference my grandmother again...but, she raised me...she raised 4 kids during the depression...single handily when her wife beating husband walked out. She maintained her faith in God...and Mom's are survivors...she relied on God and Faith...and she always did the right thing...Here was her simple rules to life...God does not have many demands on us.He wants us to do the very best we can.Love one another.Enjoy his blessings on HIS planet.Always do the right thing.And when your journey is complete...he will take to home.As, we are all heirs and heiresses to God's Kingdom.I LOVE you Lydia...I follow your writings. You have helped to empower me to do the right thing.I have no false illusions.I hope you and your beautiful family are safe and well.I wish you prosperity in God's blessings.I hope you are still enjoying the fruits of life....and I hope you are still always doing the "Right Thing"...

Full circle.

Full circle.

Much love,

Jim and Tom

This is among the many of the stories I want to reach out and help people with. Addiction is a disease...hard to kick...but you need HELP. God...never left you...you return to him...and call on family, friends and professionals.

I choose NOT to keep it a secret.

It's like...shhh. Don't tell anyone Jim was at a party again, up in the Hollywood Hills...with Big Time You Know Who...and he was drinking Dewars' Scotch...one after the other...and OMG...he put everything up his nose but a BUS...and did you know...

The stories about me go on and on...I'll set the record straight for me and many. You will get the "REAL STORY"...I promise.

This is a video of Stevie Nicks talking about her REAL STORY about drugs. This I will tell you...I've been there. I don't recommend that journey and if I can prevent just one person (I hope many) from taking the same path I did...it's worth my existence here. I hope to tell people about how I've learned and traveled down many of lives paths...THE HARD WAY. And I hope from one of my true stories...others will choose differently...and maybe the paths to what needs to be achieved for our goals won't be easy...but, I hope to help people prevent the pain and sadness.

I've been right where Stevie was. It hurt. Bad.


  1. Great Post! Beautiful writing Jim.

    Who is the blond woman in the photo with you, with your arms around each other?


  2. Thank you so much, Lydia! Coming from you...the most gifted actress, comidenne, author, journalist...award winning woman that I obviously look up to with great awe. yeah, all those adjective and adverbs were from the "real truth" That means a lot. The blond in the photo is Dr.Dawn. Dawn is a friend of mine that walked into my life and never left. We have beautiful pictures taken with "our gang" in lots of places...Martha's Vineyard, Boston Commons, Salem, Massachusetts...etc...
    She and I are such hams for the camera. That picture was taken at another Dr. friend's beach house. My friends cross all walks of life...and I love them all. I have a prostitue friend I pray for...Little Gina I call her. Dawn and Kathy (at the house where the picture was taken)are doctors of Pyschiatry. It's so strange when they get an emergency call on their cell...and they rattle off their MD stuff to save people's' lives. I totally respect them for the work they do. It's a 24/7 job of hard work...but, it's heart work too...for they care. It's equally as odd when "our gang" is out for dinner and an emergency call comes in and then a patron comes up to me and says, "Weren't you James Hillis Ford...?"
    It's weird how peole like one grain of sand come out of the woodwork and says "I know you..."

    I got to admit.
    I kind of love it.

    To answer your question that is my friend Dawn and I and the picture was taken yesterday, 01May09 at a Holiday Weekend BBQ in Swampscott, MA.
    The picture has not been re-touched.
    yeah, right.

  3. Awesome blog, bro. Keep it up, keep doing what you're doing. You're a shining light that beams down on the rest of us and if there is a God -- I surely thank Him for giving you to us.

  4. Hi Bud, Hi Lydia!
    I told you I would check back in! Mick Fleetwood lucky you! I was reading your about me, that shows a gift in itself what are you talking about. You have it!
    I was just talking to a friend in Scandinavia. Her and hubby operate a B&B and she just turned me on to some books and poems she wrote. Many of you have it you just have to get your stride. Take care, I'll be around.


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